Self Motivation

It is incredibly easy to be extrinsically motivated.  There are many things that motivate us to go and do things: money, success, fame, fear of failure.  Practically everybody can be motivated if they are guaranteed to be given something or lose something based upon their success or failure, respectively.  But what do we gain from this besides the material or emotional things?  Just like the rest of the world, we have turned ourselves into these creatures with selfish attitudes.  We have essentially said that we will not work unless we gain something from it.

The problem is, in part, finding a reason to do what we do without extrinsic motivation.  How do we do things without the promise of a reward or a punishment?  By having a genuine desire to do so.  Genuineness is not something that can be faked.  It's very definition is "being authentic; not pretending."  In order to live our lives genuinely, it must be our desire to do what we are doing: going to school, working, studying just to gain the knowledge, practicing, going to church, etc.  Yes, there are benefits to the things that we do.  However, that should not be the reason that we actually follow through with our activities.

Self-motivation is not something that comes overnight.  Yes, sporadically we can feel motivated to do something out of the blue.  However, a constant genuineness is what we should strive for - the rest - the best part of doing something, the benefits - will come as a result.

Walk the Walk

We have all heard the phrase "If you're gonna talk the talk, you better be able to walk the walk."  It is my belief that we should not be "talking the talk" aloud unless asked or given the opportunity.  A lot of talk usually equals a lot of ego, and ego is never constructive or helpful - it is merely a selfish act used to promote ourselves.

If we are going to say that we are one thing, we better be that, yes?  Why say it though?  What is the purpose of stating what we are going to do, if we could just do it without the unnecessary talk.  This is the same thing as raising our hand during a lecture and, upon being called on, saying, "I have a question," and then stating your question.  This just wastes time and energy while promoting frustration and annoyance to those that are listening.

It is my belief that everything we say and do should serve a purpose to benefit ourselves (not our egos) or somebody else.  Think of all the things we say to promote our own importance: say that we know "so and so," brag about our grades, talk about our possessions.  Get rid of the extra, trim down the edges.  I promise that it will make the people around you happier and will give you more time and more energy.  To do this, we will need to be incredibly conscientious of the words that are coming out of our mouths.  If and when the words do slip and our egos come out to play, we better be sure that we follow through with our own words and promises.

"Choose to be Happy"

The other night, I attended a forum put together by the School of Music that talked about things to consider for when we graduate: graduate school, employment, where to be, how to save, etc.  Dr. Martin's portion of the evening talked about good things to know for life in general.  He opened and closed with the phrase, "Choose to be happy."  He did not expand upon it much, but it was a pretty simple statement.  Afterwards, I looked over the notes I had taken and that phrase kept jumping out at me.  Too many times I have chosen one thing over another because it was the easier thing to do at the time.


Happiness is defined as good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy.  It's antonym is misery.  How many times have we gone through the day being miserable?  Or feeling miserable?  Well, if this is the case for more days than just the every-so-often off-day, then we are not doing what makes us happy.  


At this point in my own life, pursuing a music education degree, I feel both happy and miserable... More like I am happy to be working towards a more fulfilling happiness.  Every day, I am happy with the choice I have made to be at Texas State University, pursue a music education degree, and take on these challenges fully.  Regarding my relationships, I am overwhelmed with happiness.  My parents could not be more loving, caring, and understanding than they are and have been throughout my college career.  My sister and I have gotten to that point where we are actually friends now.  I could not as for a more compassionate, kind-hearted, selfless boyfriend to have spent the past 3 years with and who I will be happy with for a very, very, very long time.  I have, undoubtedly, the best friends in the world that put my happiness on their list of important things.  And of course, I am beyond blessed to have a God that makes me so incredibly happy.


I have chosen to worship my God.  I have chosen to pursue music education at Texas State University.  I have chosen to cultivate the relationships I have with the people in my life.  I can't say that I take credit for my own happiness - that is the Lord's doing, as he has pointed me in those directions - but I have made the decisions for myself.  I encourage you to seek happiness.  What is life without happiness?  Futile.  Don't choose futility.  Choose happiness.  Pursue happiness.  Pursue the life you want.

Who Really Matters

With every frustration, every sense of anger, and every tear, it is important to (after all the venting) step back and think about what and who truly has an impact on us and our lives.  I am, without doubt, a people-pleaser.  I like for everybody to be happy and I feel as though I should have control over their sense of happiness.  However, this is completely unrealistic.

Off the top of my head, I can name five people who's opinion of me matters: God, my parents, Nathaniel, Dr. Beatty, and Mr. Goodwin.  On the other end of the spectrum, I could name five people who's opinion of me is unimportant and that (in a few years) won't matter one bit.  When you feel as though you have messed up and who that has affected and how it has affected them, consider what that person thinks.  Then consider if that even matters.  It's not to say that pleasing people is not important, because if that person is your boss, your coworker, or your future boss or coworker, then they matter.

Today was tough.  I altered several people's opinion of me today.  I was incredibly upset afterwards.  Then, I stepped back for a moment.  I reasoned with myself.  I talked it out to other people, trying to be as completely un-biased as possible.  Each time I thought, I realized that what happened changed somebody else - not me.  In the future, today does not change anything.  I know that at the end of the day, I am who I am, I believe what I believe, and I will stick to my guns no matter what happens with any given person as long as the people who matter to me, think of me in the matter that I want them to.

So, we need to go about this by categorizing and prioritizing: what you want people to think about you and which people need to think that.  It is okay to have an initial reaction.  It is okay to get angry or sad or frustrated - that's what makes us human.  But venting is not enough, we must come to the logical conclusion that we are human, are not perfect, and can not please everybody.  But, truly, who needs to please every one they come across?

Be a Better Human

All this talk about trying to be the best you can be and striving for you very best all the time can be taxing.  For most of us, it would be difficult to give 150% on everything all the time - we only have so much brain power, concentration, and (quite frankly) motivation.  So, what is something that we can do every day that, at the very least, keeps us from slipping back into old habits of giving just 80% so that we have something left for ourselves: Be a better human.

It seems pretty simple.  My old band director use to always say "Figure it out," whenever anybody was not keyed in.  Instead of just merely figuring it out - trying to keep your head above water - take it a step further.  Do one thing at a time better.  Do one thing out of your nature or character that benefits somebody.  Off the top of my head, I can think of a hundred examples of things one could do to "be a better human."

Have you ever seen that bank commercial where somebody does something nice for somebody else while somebody watches and passes along the act of kindness?  This should be reality.  Make it your reality.  Spark more kindness.  Who knows, hopefully somebody will return the favor for you.

True Value

I know it's been a few days since I've posted, but it's because I have felt like in these posts I just keep repeating myself.  So, for this post I have decided to post my Upper Level Competency Review essay.  It is suppose to explain the following:

• Why do you choose to enter the profession?
• What is your developing philosophy?
• What do you consider your strengths and weaknesses?
• What are your goals for your career and your ultimate contribution to the profession?

For those of you that do not know the the Upper Level Competency Review (ULCR) is, it is essentially a check-in for music majors that is done by a board and includes an interview, a look at your grades, this essay, your jury for that semester, and a number of proficiency tests that must be passed.  Essentially, this decides whether or not you get to continue to pursue a music degree.  In this essay, I stick to the foundations of my beliefs and leave it for judgement.  Feel free to comment on it, make suggestions, etc.

Music is like breath – it is necessary for existence.  My parents were never ones to preach that philosophy, but they were always eager to mention the fact that they met in band.  As a result, from an early age I wanted to be in band.  At this point in time, I had no idea that I would eventually wind up majoring in music education.  While in band, I continuously exceeded the expectations for the class and was always seeking a musical challenge.  When I went into high school, I developed an even deeper understanding and appreciation of music.  It inspired me to be more dedicated, to set higher goals for myself in all aspects of life, and it taught me how to be both a leader and a follower.  As I went through high school, I realized that I wanted everybody to feel inspired, challenged, and brave like I did.  My way of doing this?  Teach.  Not only did my own feelings push me towards majoring in music education, but my high school band director encouraged me to head in this direction as well.  Mr. Allan Goodwin was the toughest teacher I ever had, and yet, I was always eager to accept, meet and, exceed the goals he set for me.  He was the one who encouraged me to test my skills in a leadership position and challenged me, not just musically, but mentally and emotionally.  I learned so much about life and about myself throughout my years under the direction of Mr. Goodwin. 

            I feel as though Mr. Goodwin taught me everything that a music teacher should: how to challenge myself, how to overcome failure, how to set goals, how to be a leader, how to be a follower, and how to obtain self-control in any situation.  All of these skills that a student of music will learn about and (hopefully) experience are what should be taught in music education within the school system.  Music is not about earning a one at UIL or coming in first at All-State.  Music is about more than just notes on the page.  Music is about learning and working as an individual and as a group towards a common goal.  It is not just those that have the talent to be in a music program that deserve to learn these life-changing lessons, but those that need them. 

I believe that I possess the necessary characteristics to be an effective and influential music educator.  I am understanding of the struggles of academics and home life.  I am both experienced and educated in the subject which I plan to teach.  I also believe that I possess the ability to control just about any situation which may arise.  I can bring control to chaos, laughter to a dead room, and seriousness to a much too relaxed group.  These characteristics are great for a teacher of any subject, and as a music educator, I am not just a teacher of music, but also of life.  Some areas in which I could use improvement include patience and the willingness to step back from a frustrating situation.  I intend to increase my patience by putting myself in situations in which I am not the person in charge.  In order to step back from a situation that I am too frustrated with to make forward progress or that is out of my control, I must first do a better job of recognizing when I am in these types of situations.

At this point in my life, with my experiences, I have learned that the fulfillment that comes from band never comes from winning the biggest trophy or beating everybody else at a competition, but it comes from the improvement, struggle, growth, and excitement that comes with the process to get from what we are able to do now to what we are able to do when we come to the final product.  In my time as a music educator, I hope to instill this mindset – that what you learn through the process is more valuable than any trophy or number – in all of my students.  My ultimate goal is to spread that way of thinking and being by any means, be it leadership training, through my writing, or by way of example.

            Music is a subject and art unlike any other.  And, although music is the true star, the music educator is the one who provides the link between the musician and the music itself.